Remember

I don't know about you.....but there are days that the sparks of romance are NOT flying in my relationship with Matt - or more affectionately - HUB :) Do we love eachother? For sure! Are we committed to eachother? You betcha! Are we riding the love train every minute, hour, day, week? Not always........

I was listening the other day to a program on Focus on the Family. Scott Stanley was speaking on marriage and had some new thoughts on rekindling the love we once knew.

He uses the verses in Revelation 2 where John is writing to the church and encouraging them for persevering in their hard work for God. But when he comes to verse 4, he says he holds one thing against them.

"You have forsaken your first love. Remember the height from which you've fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first."

Stanley relates this to the marriage relationship - which I had never heard done. As I thought more about it though - we are the bride of Christ as Christians. Our physical marriages are a reflection of the relationship Jesus has with each one of us. What a huge task we have to properly reflect this to unbelievers around us!!

From this verse, Stanley points out three directions if we have lost our "first love" - being our spouse in this case.

1. Remember
2. Repent
3. Do the things you first did

When we were first married I used to bend over backwards to make sure my Hub was comfy and had all of my attention. I would move mountains to spend time together. I wrote many love letters and spent endless hours thinking up just the right gifts. When we would fight, I was crushed to the core. We would work out every last hurtful word/thought till there was nothing between us.

Then......somehow......over time..........we begin to take eachother for granted. Now it's more important to spend time with my girls.......or friends......or facebook......or the phone. Now I don't always know what he's doing and he only gets my leftover time. The love letters are just a quick email and the gift is quickly picked out at the last minute with whatever funds are left after the kids' gifts. When we fight it's not nearly as big of a deal and I quickly dismiss it without any urgency for resolution. It doesn't seem to crush me as it used to.

While these things are not all true of me today, right now.......I have struggled with each of these things in my relationship to my dear Hub. I thought Stanley gave some great tips, from this verse, in coming back to the way it once was......

First in remembering "the good 'ol days"!!! I love reading my old journals from when we were dating. Or just sitting around and talking about our honeymoon or our years without kids.

Second in repenting....telling eachother sorry for not placing a higher importance on eachother and making a change - setting priorities.

Third in doing what you used to!!! Write the love letters......make a brag list (more on that to come in another entry).....go for walks ......spend time alone.......fight with passion :) Do things that drew you together in the first place.

These three things will bring us back to our first love - Jesus.....and our first love - our spouse.

LOVE YOU HUB!